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Random thoughts and musings of a single Mom striving to follow dreams and find pure BLISS.


W, F, and G - Part 2

Holy crap!

Just when I thought it'd be OK and I'd get through the rest of the book with out a hitch...WRONG!

I feel like a silly emo kid reading The Bell Jar or Catcher in the Rye for the first time because I want to break out my pencil and underline passages and make notes in the margines.

"Dieting was like praying. It was a plainative cry to whomever was listening: I know i am fat. I know I am ugly. I know I am undiscliplined, but see how hard I try. See how violently I restrict myself, deprive myself, punish myself. Surely there must be a reward for those who know how horrible they are. "

And that was the passage that almost made me throw up...but I continued on...

"And precisely because dieting and binging were the main ways I was expressing my despair, the consequences of not dieting or binging were staggering...like breaking a vow that was never supposed to be broken."

Moving from wanting to throw up to wanting to cry. Progress? Maybe or maybe not, I'll just have to see.

2 comments:

  1. My god, that first passage is tough to read! Maybe I need to pick this one up? But I'm scared to, with all the talk of puking and crying. I think it's progress.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Huny, I'm on 59 and it's so me and so true...But I have faith it will help me.

    ReplyDelete

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