Random thoughts and musings of a single Mom striving to follow dreams and find pure BLISS.

Blessings, Bloopers, and Why ya can't have beer at 6 AM

Although I went to bed at 8:30 PM, sleep visited me in only brief snatches of time. It seemed that my dreams were taunting me by showing worlds and ideas that were not true and could never be true. (Sorry, I'm not in college and since she's retired, I don't see myself having Mrs. Frye again.) While awake my mind began forming things around me into categories and flinging ideas at me so quickly that I wished I had a pen and paper.

So, I finally got up, thinking it was still the middle of the night, figuring I'd grab a beer and sit and write out my lists and work on my story. Nope. It was 6 AM. The idea of getting a beer still sounded good, but just seemed a bit scuzzy, so I made coffee instead. Here are my lists thus far...

  • While plauged with allergies (still), I am healthy. Allergies will not kill me, only make my face hurt.
  • My children are healthy.
  • I have a family that loves and supports me.
  • I have great friends that love and support me.
  • I have reconnected with people who have become more important to me now than they were in the past and I didn't think that possible.
  • I can vent my frustrations through this and no tells me to shut my whiney ass up.
  • No one has told me to shut my whiney ass up.
  • I have my position at University of Phoenix, which is an income, and could become full time if I keep plugging along.
  • I received a raise at U of Phoenix and was already offered 2 more classes after my current 2 end.
  • I have pleasant children that make me laugh, even when they aren't on their best behavior.
  • I have people in my life that remind me to get off my whiney ass and take chances. (Thanks, Cuz)
  • I am loved and accepted as I am.
  • I understand that while I am love and accepted as I am, it's perfectly ok for me to grow, change, and evolve as necessary.
  • My pity parties, while HUGE, do not last long.
  • Although I can still feel the gash in my soul from last year each time I hit a set-back, it is smaller and a bit less painful.
  • I do not have to constatly be on my toes, wondering what I will do wrong next. I am actually not reminded of my screw up anymore by anyone but myself. Perhaps I should give myself a break?!
  • I do not have to share my children with anyone who woudl be mean to them (or me).
  • I do not have to endure the constant ex-husband drama that so many of my divorced friends do.
  • In two weeks I get to have three days of uninterrupted "I can do whatever I want" time away from all worries and cares with my Sisters.
  • I have parents who like me and the kids living with them and do not find us a burden. 
  • I have the freedom, ability, and education to achieve whatever it is I decide I want.  
  • Lack of spelling ability isn't painful.
  • My daughter has managed to strip off her pants and diaper twice during  our trip, which is impressive since she ususally manages that in 15 mins at home, but running through a house of boys and watching the boys reactions of horror is pretty darn funny. (Especially since she thinks it's hilarious!)
  • My son fell off the bed twice while asleep and never woke up. I just pulled him back on the bed with me and he only sighed and rolled over. It was all I could do not to crack up when I suddenly hear THUD and no longer feel him beside me.
  • His feet also slipped off the bed once. He would have stayed alseep, feet on floor, head on pillow for the rest of the night had I not, once again, pulled him back onto the bed.
  • I am constantly impressed and amused by the various ways in which my nephews can plant themselves and sleep. For example, Dylan is stretched, face down, in the chair across from me-head propped up on one arm rest and feet propped over the other. It looks very uncomfortable to me, but he is sleeping well.
  • I realized tonight that my Cait sounds like Maggie Simpson, excpt Cait uses her thumb instead of a pacifier.
Ya can't always get whatcha want, but you find you get whatcha need. (Thanks, Mick!)


  1. and I love to watch the evolution of you!!!! A wise friend of mine once said, "your either growing and changing,, or your dying and stagnant". Growing and changing is good.... Personally, I can't wait until I grow up, I can't wait to see what life has in store for me, there are so many roads not yet traveled... and yes I know most of them are "off the hill", but that may or may not happen,,, I look forward to prospects and things to come... I hope you find peace in the future and opportunities that are just waiting for you to find them... Kinda like an Easter egg hunt. BTW.. there are usually MANY golden eggs if we keep looking... I love you so big

  2. I'm so happy and proud, Jamie! I have to say, this is my favorite post yet. I know that something big is going to happen for you.


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